Tag Archives: pandemic

COL710: LoR: Self-care

In this episode of Cubs Out Loud, it’s time for another Landscape of Relationships. Dr. Edward Angelini-Cooke joins the cubs again to discuss self-care. From taking time for your personal needs to finding your stress levels minimize while out with friends, listen as the guys analyze the ins and outs of self-care. But is providing self-care selfish? Find out as Dr. Ed helps the guys learn more about it.

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Landscape of Relationships: Self-care

What is self-care?

The National Institute in Mental Health says that “self-care means taking the time to do things that help you live well and improve both your physical health and mental health. When it comes to your mental health, self-care can help you manage stress, lower your risk of illness, and increase your energy. Even small acts of self-care in your daily life can have a big impact” (NIMH, December, 2022).

Examples of self-care 

  • Exercise 
  • Eating well and hydration 
  • Regular sleep 
  • Relaxing activity 
  • Goal setting (realistic goals, I mean)
  • Gratitude 
  • Practice acceptance and mindfulness 
  • Stay connected 

What isn’t here? 

  • Important question when it comes to self-care.  Am I practicing self-care or am I avoiding something?
  • Short term discomfort for long-term gain

What does it mean to practice self-care in relationships?

Differentiation of Self

  • One of the cornerstones of Bowen family systems theory, which states that families are an emotional system.  A person’s ability to manage the relationship between individualization and togetherness determines someone’s differentiation of self.  
  • Differentiated individuals are able to manage conflict without emotional reactivity, maintain their I-state, reach compromises; whereas, undifferentiated individuals tend to fuse with others or blend their emotional state with others, or their will exhibit emotional cutoff, which is where someone will manage their own emotional process by creating emotional and physical distance with someone.  

Social Self-care 

  • No person is an island and neither are you, ok?
  • Sometimes self-care is connecting with others and working on our relationships with others. 
  • Six Hours to a Better Relationship 

Final thoughts 

  • Reach healthy differentiation of self by identifying your own needs in conjunction with your relationship needs….AND recognize, accept, and validate the individual needs of the members of your relationships.  You will do yourself and everyone else a HUGE favor.  
  • “Self-care ain’t selfish” – Adoom 
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COL698: LTA… CPAPs, finally!

In this episode of Cubs Out Loud, it’s time for another Let’s Talk About… This time around, the guys finally get around to talking about something that has plagued bear runs for years: CPAPs! With two of the co-hosts having them, the cubs discuss their challenges and successes with their usage. From restful sleep to increased energy and…libido, listen in as the guys share their experiences.

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LTA… CPAPs, finally!

As we become cubs of a certain age, our bodies also change and along comes one of the most ubiquitous accessories in the bear community! Do you have a CPAP or BiPAP? Have you been avoiding getting tested for one? Find out what the hosts think of their experiences as recent-ish newcomers to the scene.

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COL695: LTA… The Blood Ban, Again

In this episode of Cubs Out Loud, it’s time for another Let’s Talk About… This time around, the guys return to a previous conversation regarding the FDA’s recent changes to the “blood ban”. Back during COVID, the ban for men who have sex with men was relaxed somewhat. Now, the ban has been changed again and broadens the ability for MSM to give blood. But are the changes for the better? Listen in as the cubs debate the new changes and discuss the potential benefits it may have for the community at large.

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LTA… The Blood Ban, Again

So the FDA made an announcement about changes to qualifying persons when it comes to donating blood. What exactly is the new deal? And does it benefit the LGBTQIA+ community?

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COL687: LTA… Aging

In this episode of Cubs Out Loud, it’s time for another Let’s Talk About… For this episode the topic is…ummm…aging! While they may refer to themselves as cubs, the hosts have definitely gotten older over time. And with that passage of time, things have also changed for them physically, mentally and beyond. With Gary reaching a milestone birthday later this year, what are some of the new experiences the guys have had in recent years and are there any lessons of wisdom that others could learn? What might younger members of the community have in store for their future? Listen in as these old gays–I mean cubs–wax nostalgia about getting older, but wiser.

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LTA… Aging

While we may refer to ourselves as cubs, it’s been a bit o’time since COL got started. And with that passage of time, things have also changed for us physically and beyond. As Gary leads the pack in reaching a new milestone birthday later this year, what are some of the new experiences we’ve had in recent years? Are there any lessons of wisdom that others could learn from? What might younger members of the community have in store for their future?

 

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COL682: Bears in Entertainment Media Today

In this episode of Cubs Out Loud, the cubs turn on the TV and get into a discussion about bears in the media today. The guys ponder the question about bear representation in films, TV and more and how it has changed over the years. Are there still stigmas about hirsute chubby men or have we become “mainstream”? Tune in as the cubs share their feelings on the subject while waxing nostalgia about bearish actors of yore.

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Bears in Entertainment Media Today

Given the changes in the media landscape over the past decades, is there any bear representation today? Do we continue to see fatphobia in the entertainment media, especially when it comes to men regardless of their self-identified sexual orientation? Has the bear community peaked in the media as the broader LGBTQ+ family continues integrating into the broader world society?

In The Last Us’ zombie hellscape… – The Guardian Article

 

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