Tag Archives: MSM

COL635: LTAS: Sex Starvation

In this episode of Cubs Out Loud, it’s another installment of Let’s Talk About Sex. For this episode, the cubs talk about being hangry for handjobs, famished for facials and in anticipation of anal. As the pandemic heads into its 3rd year, the cubs discuss sexual starvation. As many gays & others are dealing with the lack of touch of another person, what can be done to get their freak on while still mitigating risk? From creating sex bubbles to taking matters into your own hands, listen as the guys find ways to satiate the sexually starved.

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Lets Talk About Sex: Sex Starvation

The cubs return to talk about sex, or the lack of it…for a long time. The pandemic isn’t ending soon so are the gays getting their freak on or holding back due to COVID?

 

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COL595: Landscape of Relationships: Trust Part 1

In this episode of Cubs Out Loud, the guys are joined again by Edward Angelini-Cooke to continue our Landscape of Relationships series. This time the guys discuss trust. For this first part, the guys begin to break down the anatomy of trust. From the romantic to the familial, Ed leads the cubs through the initial tenets as they begin to break down what trust truly is.

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Landscape of Relationships: Trust

  • What is trust?

“Trust is choosing to make something important to you vulnerable to the actions of someone else” – Charles Feldman

“Mistrust is what I shared with you that is important to me is not safe with you.” – Charles Feldman 

Vault -”Common enemy intimacy”

Brené Brown: Anatomy of Trust

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COL580: LTAS: Sides

In this episode of Cubs Out Loud, Let’s Talk About Sex!  The guys are joined by resident Sex Therapist Edward Angelini-Cooke to discuss “sides”. You know of tops, bottoms, and versatiles; but do you know about sides? Listen in as the cubs define this role in the MSM community and what it means in the sexual spectrum.

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Sides 

  • Definition?

Joe Kort developed the term in 2013 after not engaging in anal intercourse and feeling frustrated answering the “top or bottom” question.  “Can I be a side?”

A side is typically a man who has sex with another man (MSM) who does not engage in anal intercourse or penetration as it is not part of their erotic orientation.  Erotic orientation reflects your sexual fantasies, desires, and sexual behaviors.  

Self-labels (labels used to describe anal sex behaviors….or does it):

  • Top 
  • Bottom 
  • Versatile 
    • What if you don’t fit into any of those groups?  shame…guilt….FOMO…et al. 
  • Sides 

Articles:

Videos: Barry Birkholz

Book: Erotic Mind: Unlocking the Inner Sources of Passion and Fulfillment 

Podcast: Smart Sex, Smart Love: Episode 50 Side Guys

  • Awareness?
    • Side Guys Facebook Group  (currently 323 members)
    • Many different presentations of sides 
    • Sex is not just penetration 
    • Navigating conversations about being a “side” 
    • Inclusive language verse exclusive language 
  • Acceptance?

Backlash from gay community…

  • Interest?
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COL569: LTAS: Bubbles/Pods

In this episode of Cubs Out Loud, it’s time for another Let’s Talk About Sex show. For this one, the guys discuss the concept of sex bubbles or sexpods, a safer sex practice of maintaining social/sexy time with a smaller group of people to help keep yourselves protected during the pandemic. Listen in as the guys tell more about “quaranteaming” and debate on its potential effectiveness. When thinking about it, is it really new or just necessary?

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Sex Bubbles/Pods 

  • Definition?
  • Safety?
  • Potential?
  • Interest?

How to Form a Pandemic Pod | Greater Good 

“quarantine pods” as an effective way to get our social, emotional, familial, and sexual needs met without unnecessarily endangering ourselves or others. Pods are small, self-contained networks of people who limit their non-distanced social interaction to one another—in other words, they’re the small group of people with whom you share air without using breath-control precautions such as masks.

Pods (or “bubbles” or “containers” or “quaranteams”) aren’t just ways for people to have social connections within a pandemic. They also serve an important epidemiological purpose—they help limit the size and spread of outbreaks. That’s one reason why in the Bay Area, where the authors live, public health officials recommend that pods be no larger than 12 people who live across three households, and that pods limit their non-distanced social contact to one another for at least three weeks.

Despite the centrality of sex to our lives, many of us are ashamed of having sexual needs. This is tragic, because we should be no more ashamed of needing sexual contact than we should be of needing food. So, be honest with yourself and others: If you want to form a pod to meet sexual needs, say so, rather than concealing or minimizing that purpose.

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COL554: HNU: COVID-19 & Semen

In this episode of Cubs Out Loud, it’s another Hostful New Update. As has been discussed in recent weeks, the cubs again are discussing the COVID-19 pandemic. This time around, they come together after recent reports indicate that the coronavirus can be found in semen. The guys review the information and examine what this could mean for those who enjoy the occasional bukkake.

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COVID-19 has stuck around and recently a small study out of China reported that SARS-CoV-2 was found in the semen of men diagnosed with COVID-19. What does this mean for ICS [Individuals having Contact with Semen]?

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