In this episode of Cubs Out Loud, the guys present their next installment of the “What is…” series. After COL508, where the cubs talked about self-love, this time they’re talking about the opposite: self-hatred. What does self-hate involve? Can you truly love yourself and still knock other people down?
Show Topic
What is…Self-Hatred?
Discussion of what ‘Self-Hatred’ encompasses. Does the LGB community truly hate itself? Are our own micro aggressions ways of inflicting self-hatred? Can we talk about ‘love’ and still beat ourselves and others down? And what if you just don’t care? Is that self-hatred?
In this episode of Cubs Out Loud, it’s our What’s Going On episode for the month of June. This time around, the guys talk about butt stuff, and dungeons, and sexual positions and more….Wait, is this an episode of Let’s Talk About Kink? Not really.
What’s Going On?
Jeff: Night Shift & Dragons
Damon: Job News & Colonoscopy & Yesterday
Gary: New Stuff is Rough
Feedback:
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Steven Maxwell
สามารถ สมาธาร [Thai – Able to Stream]
Anwar Lordsire
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bronparty
Twitter Followers:
@jkiykvgi
@PardueJeffery
@cockeyekink
@cenlapup
@thetalentedpen1
@Lukys3189
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@RealMenFullBush
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Recent Shows
COL511: WTG – May 2019
FB215: Black Shirt Friday
COL512: What is. . . Pride?
COL513: 50 Years From Now
COL514: Trans Bear Listener
Blog Post:
Name: Howard N
Message: Hey guys. Wanted to write an email. Pride month is coming up and I wanted to talk a little bit about it, if I may. Pride can mean a lot of things to a lot of people, and I know the holiday is more specifically concerning lgbt+ persons, but I wanted to say a little bit about what Pride is to me. My coming out is a little different from regular coming outs, with bits being thing that are the same. I remember being so ashamed of who I am, as my background was heavily influenced by the Christian religion. I remember my first boyfriend, and the way he sat on my bed in my college paid apartment room and stated, “I’m not shy”. And the way I walked toward the bed and sat down and being instantly drawn to be felt against his body as he kissed my forehead. Cut forward a bit, I remember being angry with my mother on the phone after the day I had come out to her when she had come down for a visit. I remember feeling like she no longer understood me after years of being close (I was 20 at the time). Cut forward a bit more to a Kohl’s clothing store. I remember my first ex telling me to stop following him around as we were walking around the store. Cut to nights of feeling heartbroken and being taken advantage of. Cut to following relationships with guys and wanting to find somebody like him and me wanting to find someone I felt comfortable with again cause I no longer felt at home under the same roof with my mom. Cut to my self-hate and resentment at myself for getting so emotionally attached to people that I can’t let go, they hang around like ghosts in my head. Cut to the realization that my self-hate was more than just the fact that I was gay. And cut to me learning about Neurodiversity and autism. And how suicide ideation is more common in autistics who mask their neurology to suit the needs of the many. And to me realizing why I have such a hard time with understanding the dynamics of relationships. Being autistic is a lot like being gay in the fact that you don’t want to come out of the closet, even when everybody can tell there’s something different about you, wrong even. All through school I wanted to be like others so bad. I did weird stupid stuff to try and fit in with the social norms. But there’s a constant anxiety, and as you grow older, the anxiety turns into what’s called a mental illness (meaning you can be so afraid to the point of paranoia). This paranoia comes around particularly with people I like because I want so bad for them to like me and am so afraid of losing. Friends have lost connection, romantic relationships go sour…….I don’t want this anymore. I don’t want to be ashamed of who I am, the way I act and think differently from others, the way I react or my stimming (a term for autistics to explain the things they do to cope with stress). I want to stop being afraid of being social and being taken the wrong way. I take Pride in the fact that I am wired differently. (Btw, the symbol for Neurodiversity is a rainbow infinity)
Email:
Gents,
Thank you all for doing this show. I so greatly respect your willingness to be public and open about your learning and growth; it’s not easy. The trans community is so important to me (a close partner is trans, long story), and I’m always so happy to see continued growth in the acceptance and support of our trans siblings. More learning for me too.
Some thoughts that crossed my mind while listening:
I think Jeff had a great idea; more trans porn! Lots of learning (up close and personal) to be had with more porn. No harm, lots of education, no one feeling under the microscope.
I think a guest on the show to talk more about the trans experience is a great idea. And while I love Hadrian, I feel like despite his breadth of experience (no shade!), it should really be a trans-masculine bear to discuss it in more depth.
A podcast recently came out called Two Headed Girl, where a trans-masculine person discusses a lot of issues around their transition. The two hosts are great. Might not be the kind of focused piece that’s helpful but it’s a wonderfully personal show.
Anyway, just random listener thoughts. Thanks again for keeping me company.
Best,
/Chris G
New comment on your post “COL513: 50 Years Later”
Author: Patrick B. (bostonareabear)
Next on COL – episode 3133 (50 years from now in 2069) We will hear Hadrian read from his latest short story titled “Get off my lawn and get into my Craftmatic Adjustable Bed!”
In this episode of Cubs Out Loud, the guys share their honest opinions about the ongoing debate between honesty and truth. Do we really want others’ honest opinions? Listen in as the guys discuss the differences between these two similar but different words. Do they really want to hear the T or are they good with just a little honest-T?
Show Topic
We say we want people to tell us how they feel. But do we really? And what exactly is the difference between being honest versus telling the truth? Are they the same? Or do we confuse the two?
In this episode of Cubs Out Loud, it’s time for another cup of tea as the guys present an All T, No Shade show. This time around, the cubs read and respond to your feedback on some of our most recent episodes. Also, some Thanksgiving leftover conversations and the guys thirsting on some pics.
Jeff: Marriage & Adoption in Stardew and lazy grocery shopping
Damon: I’m Back! ATL and Thanksgiving.
Chester: Banned, Birthday, Visitors, Escape Room
Gary: Recovery Mode Engaged
Feedback:
Facebook Likes:
Mark Wolf
Nick DeCoopman
Drew Littlefield
Bob Green
Boy Quinton
Lovel Trahan (Pugsley’s BF)
Princess Baron
Milady Lyn
Tom Wray
Donnie Royse
Morgan J McChurch
YouTube Subscribers:
Zak Jackson
Brian McGee
Blog Comment:
Re: COL430: TTO: Labor Gay: @twatTUBBS’ comment: “just catching up on this show after I been doing alot of travelin, Im the “cigar at work” guy and it made my day that you liked my post. I watch your show all the time guys, love it and thanks for the shout out. O and to the points broght up about the pics, I am faily built but I am a foodie, it was a great cigar yes. (Alec Bradley) and its not sweat it was oil, those are clips from a vid I made on youtube, let me know if you want the link. TUBBS”
Re: COL437: Old School Bears Online: tnliving’s comment: “Having a different view in some part of one’s personal life shouldn’t disqualify them from being a valued member of a community. Just like we don’t want to be excluded or discriminated from normal civic life because we are gay, we also shouldn’t exclude others based on their political views in general. As with most issues there are plenty of grey areas but being a Donald Trump supporter is not comparable to maybe being a founder of a gay reformation group. Being an active participant in the Westboro Baptist church should probably preclude somebody from being taken seriously leading a gay social group. Being a Republican (even a Trump Republican) certainly should not in my opinion.”
Not an ask but a thanks … It was great to hear you on the latest episode of Cubs Out Loud!! I kinda fan boyed a bit and may have even did a bit of a squeeeee!!!! too!! Thanks for being involved, it was great to hear you share your knowledge, experience and perspective.
Sure, bub! I’m a semi-regular guest host with the boys from@cubsoutloud, and have probably been on eight or ten episodes–including at least three video episodes that are available on their YouTube channel. You can probably find them all using the tag cloud over onthe COL website.
W Bear – Chester:
Rootbeer Pup and Grizzly: You guys are awesome, I love your shows. Keep up the good work. I love listening to you guys when I can.
(We then got into a discussion about cigars from COL436: Smokin’ in the Bears Den
W Bear – Gary:
Cody says “Hey I love your pictures handsome and I relly like your podcast it got me through my weekend cleaning job and now my commute 😉
Yay! Thanks for letting us know. We’re glad it helped you pass the time. 🙂
Show Topic
ATNS: Feedback
Re: COL440: The Klondykes: From [Redacted]: This is NOT a comment of hate, this is a comment of reality……I 1st saw pics of this “contest” on the old (better) Bear Underground site. They were posted by the winner of the “Glitter Bear” title, ya know, the guy who is dolphin smooth and not bear like in any way.. After looking at these very disturbing pictures I simply asked- What do the red\pink stripes stand for then? Of course he replied that he didn’t know and that they were just shades of red and pink. So one can only figure the color stripes stand for the “Klondikes” heavy to lite flow days. The True Bear Community has been being tainted for years and years. This is the straw that breaks the community and welcomes camel toe. Bear means hair, with that in mind I wonder, do these so-called lesbian bears not shave and grow huge bushes?? This entire Bear’s Welcome Everybody thing has gone way too far. There is a line, and the Klondikes are it. Sad to see so many forget their roots.
In show response regarding the colors in the logo: Per our guest Courtney Chesser: “I’m so glad someone asked! The logo was made by local Aly shine. It is a mixture of the bear pride flag and femme flag on our behalf. The pinks are the bear pride “skin” colors translated into shades of pink. Pink is traditionally displayed in the femme pride flag so it’s accepting of all ranges of skin as well as ranges of femininity.”
In this episode of Cubs Out Loud, we are joined by Ches to talk about intergenerational relationships: the good, the bad, and the uncomfortable. We get it on with the May-December, throw down with All the Young Dudes, dust off our Silver Daddy/Santa fantasies, and talk about how cubs and Daddy bears make age-gaps in relationships work.
In this episode of Cubs Out Loud, the guys present their next installment of the “What is…” series. After COL508, where the cubs talked about self-love, this time they’re talking about the opposite: self-hatred. What does self-hate involve? Can you truly love yourself and still knock other people down?
