roles | Cubs Out Loud – The Bear Podcast of Indeterminate Length

Show Topic

Landscape of Relationships: Creating Your Party

Charlie T

“How about parental/in-law relationships? Times where lines were crossed (and boundaries should’ve been set), or picking chosen family that’s actually healthy for you (vs just spoiling yourself)? (honestly I’m out of ideas)”

Tommy H

“Maybe about when it’s time to end a long relationship. Some early advice I got was not to talk about breaking up or divorcing until you were actually ready to do it”

Social Capital

Pierre Bourdieu (French Sociologist)

Social capital is the sum of the resources, actual or virtual, that accrue to an individual or a group by virtue of possessing a durable network of more or less institutionalized relationships of mutual acquaintance and recognition.

Robert Putman, political scientist, defined social capital as “Connections among individuals — social networks and the norms of reciprocity and trustworthiness that arise from them.”

Queer Social Capital and Chosen Families

In this episode of Cubs Out Loud, we welcome Ches and Matt to lead an in depth discussion on Dom/sub relationships. From defining some of the terms to offering their takes on the dynamics, the guys exchange insights and provide an intriguing dialogue on power exchange and control.

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What’s Going On?

[Damon]-Where I Have Been (Comic Con, Bluegrass Leather, Ren Fair)
[Gary] – Getting Older

Weekly Topic

BDSM Discussion: Dom/sub Dynamics

Dom/sub, Daddy/boy, Sir/boy, Master/slave
- Role play vs Power Exchange
- Power Exchange
  - Dom/sub – umbrella
  - “With great power comes great responsibility”
    - Master/slave – focus on pleasure of Master; steward/guardian of slave
    - Daddy/boy & Sir/boy – conditional submission; varying kinds
      - Daddy/boy – mentoring, growth and nurturing for better service in and out; temporary relationship with a defined beginning and end
      - Sir/boy – personal service tailored to the Sir ; extended dynamic with long term possibility
Labels, Identities & Titles
- Look at the power exchange
- Self-identification
- Thoughts on Being a Bear
- “Respect somebody else’s kink”
  - Needs, Activities, Experiences
- “Safe, Sane, and Consensual” – old mantra?
- “RACK – Risk, Aware, Consensual, Kink” – new mantra?
Play Dynamics vs. Scene Dynamics vs. Relationship Dynamics
- Play – experiencing with known boundaries
- Scene – substantial power exchange; individuals familiar with aspects of time, players, experience levels
- Relationship – extend outside of private settings, more public appearance
Closeness of Leather/BDSM Community
- Support structure for others
Respect, Reciprocity and Abuse
Personal Responsibility in Representation
Local Community Reaction
- EXCLUSIVE: Buechel residents oppose so-called ‘social club’
- The outing of Ms. Constance.
For Da Noobz