Tag Archives: huzbear

COL421: Couples Age Differences

In this episode of Cubs Out Loud,  we are joined by Ches to talk about intergenerational relationships: the good, the bad, and the uncomfortable. We get it on with the May-December, throw down with All the Young Dudes, dust off our Silver Daddy/Santa fantasies, and talk about how cubs and Daddy bears make age-gaps in relationships work.

Introduction Topics

What’s Going On?

  • Jeff: Computer Down, Repeat, Computer Down!
  • Damon: Part of an panel
  • Chester: It’s been a hell of a month!
  • Gary: Guess who’s back in the house?
  • Ches: Pride; Birthday; Welcome baby Finnian!

Feedback:

Facebook Comment:

  • Andrew Ealy ordered a COL T-Shirt and sent us a photo with the message “How YOU doin’ !!! Got my new COL shirt today!”

Twitter Followers:

Twitter Messages:

  • @dftbapaul in re: to
    • COLSP06: Daddy’s Day Storytime
      • “Whew that was sexy. Blushing at work
      • In a reply to @fyzzgiggidy
        • Btw a good way to get more info is to go to the @cubsoutloud podcast and use the search feature and look up the ltak (let’s talk about kink)
    • Missing COLDR tweets.

Weekly Topic

Relationships with Age Spans between the Partners

  • Age is a number… Generational Gaps no longer defined
  • Values, Morals, and Ethics.
    • Values: Are having an emotional investment (either for or against something)
    • Morals: Are your ideas of what is right and what is wrong
    • Ethics: Are a set of rules which are explicitly adopted by a group of people
  • Age, Maturity, Life Experiences
    • Older Age =/= Mature, just as Younger Age =/= immature
  • Friends and Family Reactions/Acceptance
  • Challenges
    • Lack of life experiences can be frustrating
    • Facing down the question of mortality
  • Advantages
    • Experiencing new things together
      • Sharing our favorite things
        • music, movies, Gaming/TTG
      • Seeing things “new” again
      • The ability to help teach

Cooldown Topics

I’ll Tumbl For Ya:

Links:

Download Podcast

 

COL288: Let’s Talk About Kink – Protocols

In this episode of Cubs Out Loud, we welcome back Ches and Matt to discuss the topic of protocols in a BDSM power exchange. From examples in their relationship, the cubs get to learn more about what protocols actually are and the benefits they serve the dom/sub relationship

What’s Going On?

  • [Jeff] – Molten Corgi
  • [Damon] – Housebuying…meh
  • [Gary] – FOOD, FRIENDSHIP, and SNOW
  • [Ches] – Went to Makers Mark distillery with the huzbear yesterday; judged Mr. Crossings Leather last night – whip gone missing; getting excited for Midwest Bearfest
  • [Matt] – Too good for AT&T

Feedback:

COL WEBSITE: About Us

From Anthony:

I am in love with this podcast! You guys are super funny and give really good advice. As someone who is young and came out fairly recently you guys have really helped me be informed I never knew I should know about as a gay man. You’re like the gay dads I wish I had. I love you guys a lot, keep doing what you’re doing and I look forward to whats next. ;3

P.S. You guys should do more stuff with Gabe, Matt, and Hadrian. And more on the road stuff with Gary. Please and thank you!

[Cubs Out Loud] Comment: “COL282: Let’s Talk About Kink – Dom/sub, you don’t say!”

From Reggie S.

Great job!  I’m really a bit sad I listened to this in the car on my way to work this morning as there were so many things I wanted to write down and say here in the comments.  I still have about 20 minutes more to listen to but I figure why not get it all down while it’s still got that hot french fry feeling!  First of all, thank you for doing this show, you’re providing a great service.  Secondly, thanks for having fantastically educated guests who don’t pull punches but delivered digestible doses of truth and education on a topic I am still coming to understand myself.  I’m still new to my life as a sub; being a black man in the United States who has race play as one of his kinks has taken some getting use to. That being said, your guests made one point that resonated deeply with me and I wanted to thank them and the show for it… Function over Form.  There have been many situations in my life as a gay man where I have felt very “on the outside”. Sir has proven to me that, despite any outside disqualifications I may have to any given group, I do have things to offer. I wouldn’t be so bold as to speak for Sir but he has never denied me. I am his boy. Regardless of whatever preconceived notions I still have of my outside appearance or the validity of this relationship to others, he has never failed to make me feel like his and that has in many ways allowed me to feel what it is like “on the inside”.  Thanks again and keep up the great work.  😀

Weekly Topic

Protocol

  • What is Protocol? [Definition, types, examples]
    • Rules, rituals, formalized behaviors
      • hard and fast rules
      • situational suspension of protocol
      • growth, progress and process
    • Immediate service-based protocol
    • Distance protocols
    • Examples
      • Speech/communication/signals
        • use of titles, names, modes of speech
          • interruptions
        • check-ins, reports, being “on call”
        • hand signals, gestures
        • reflection protocol – diary, blog, vlog, etc.
      • Clothing
        • by setting
        • prohibited/required items
      • Body position
        • presentation
        • movement in groups
      • Direct service
        • Sexual service
          • Chastity, orgasm control/denial
        • Situational behavior – social, public, private
      • Prohibited behaviors
      • Assigned tasks/programs of behavior
    • Creating/Implementing protocols in a power-exchange dynamic
      • purpose (narrow vs. broad)
        • personal development
        • communication purposes
        • expression of power imbalance
      • effectiveness (review, feedback)
        • periodic, contingency
      • changes to protocol
        • protocol stagnation, when protocol becomes habitual
      • pacing: too much, too little, too fast, too slow
  • What is it good for? (ie. What does everybody get out of it?)
    • What subs take away from protocols…
    • What Doms take away from protocols…
    • What outsiders take away from seeing the protocols of others…
  • What happens when protocol breaks down?
    • Keep it, fix it or scrap it?
    • Remember to focus on purpose and effectiveness at achieving that purpose

I’ll Tumbl For You:

Links:

Download Podcast