bighoustonbear’s blog

The ‘C’ Word

The ‘C’ word…….

It is a vulgar term.

It is a word people rarely use, but when spoken, quite clearly evokes negative emotions in those who hear it, and often disdain for the one who speaks it.

It is a word that, no matter who-when-why it is spoken, immediately instills a somber mood.

This ‘C’ word is Cancer.

My father was recently diagnosed with Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma. They say that if you have to get a cancer, this is the one to get – very treatable, with a very high rate of success in treatment. How anyone – especially a board-certified oncologist – can say “If you have to get a cancer….” is quite simply out of their minds. As if my father just up and one day decided he just had to have cancer, and just had to have this particular strain. My father’s tumor is in his left maxillary sinus (think just to the outside of the apple of your cheek bone), which is extremely rare, but even still a generally good prognosis.

I’ve not discussed this with many people; only my immediate co-workers and my “friends” in the bear club I belong to. I must say, I’ve had more “How is your dad doing, Tony?” from my three co-workers than from anyone in the bear group. It’s amazing how totally self-involved people in our community are.  I was in Austin helping my dad and step-mom this past weekend – the only call I got from anyone in the bears (not that I ever get a call for any other reason, either) was from one friend in the bears asking for help with a clue in a scavenger hunt.

Maybe I, as well, have become too self-involved; maybe I’m being selfish to expect more from people. Maybe “fair-weather friends” is the best I could hope for in this group. I would like to think not; I would also like to think that this would be a turning point in how I connect with others. Maybe it’s time for me to start making those “How are you doing today?” phone calls. I guess it all has to start somewhere, right?

2 thoughts on “bighoustonbear’s blog”

  1. You know, my parter Karl was diagnosed with Hodgkin's Lymphoma which is also considered very treatable and within 3 years he died. While I hope that he survives his cancer treatment, make sure he's prepared for the worse. Karl ended up not having life insurance when he died and he didn't have a will. So I'm having to go through probate and pay money out of my pocket so I'm not kicked out of the house that he wanted me to have. It's a terrible thing not to be ready. I hope you don't have the problems I've had.

  2. You know, my parter Karl was diagnosed with Hodgkin’s Lymphoma which is also considered very treatable and within 3 years he died. While I hope that he survives his cancer treatment, make sure he’s prepared for the worse. Karl ended up not having life insurance when he died and he didn’t have a will. So I’m having to go through probate and pay money out of my pocket so I’m not kicked out of the house that he wanted me to have. It’s a terrible thing not to be ready. I hope you don’t have the problems I’ve had.

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