Tag Archives: connection

Podcast

COL821: The Decline of Bear Culture?

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In this episode of Cubs Out Loud, the guys return to a familiar topic to give it a deeper look. After recently discussing the future of bear runs (see COL818), new developments and losses to the bear community at large give the cubs reason to readdress this uncertainty. Taking time to deliberate the history and potential decline of bear culture, listen in as the guys discuss what the future holds for the community. Is it truly dying out or is it shifting and molding into something new.

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In episode 818, we talked about the future of bear runs here in the US. In the past couple of weeks, we found out that another bear run is coming to an end. A tech founder from the earliest days for the bear online culture foundation left this mortal coil. 

Recently some were informed of the passing of one of the founders of the Bear Mailing List, aka the infamous BML in 1986. For those that don’t know, 

The Bears’ Mailing List (aka BML) is an Internet mailing list in digest format for gay and bisexual men who are bears themselves and for those who enjoy the company of bears. It is hosted by Roger Klorese and Henry Mensch. The BML is designed to be a forum to bring together folks with similar interests for conversation, friendship and sharing of experiences. Steve Dyer and Brian Gollum started the mailing list in  August 1988, and since then it has grown to a community of more than 1400 men (and a few women) world-wide.  On average, a new digest 20-30K bytes long arrives via email every other day or so. Source: http://www.qrd.org/qrd/electronic/email/bears 

As founders and developers leave our lives, are we seeing the decline of Bear Culture at large? As we are facing an aging population, the question begs what of the Bear Culture at large? Or is this only happening here in the United States? Perhaps we’re entering a new chapter where things will be different than before

Does the Bear pride flag have meaning anymore? Does the return of the Bear History Project foretell that we need to document and archive our community before it’s gone?

 

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Podcast

COL782: LTAS: First Experiences

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In this episode of Cubs Out Loud, it’s time for another Let’s Talk About Sex. This time around, the guys reminisce about their first times. Taking a trip down memory lane, listen as the cubs share their experiences of making love for the first time. What lessons did they learn and what help could it give to today’s gays?

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LTAS: First Experiences

The Let’s Talk About Sex series returns and this time the hosts are recalling their earliest encounters. It’s time to use the way back machine and take a trip down memory lane. What lessons did we learn that could help folks today? How have things changed for the better or worse?

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COL755: LoR: We Hurt Where We Care

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In this episode of Cubs Out Loud, it’s time for another Landscape of Relationships. Dr. Edward Angelini-Cooke is back with the cubs to explore the somewhat darker side of relationships. This time around, Ed leads the guys on a journey through hurt from those we love and how to find a positive perspective from this.

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Landscape of Relationships: We Hurt Where We Care

Relationships have a lot of benefits, but they are not going to be without conflict and other life difficulties.  So what do you do when that happens?

Fear not!  I have a couple things to tell you that will be helpful.  

  1. “We Hurt Where We Care” 
    1. Russ Harris’ “When Life Hits Hard”
    2. Your pain tells you that this is important to you
    3. Self-compassion
  2. Brene Brown’s BRAVING model.  
    1. the G stands for Generous. 
    2. Let’s be generous with our loved ones when they mess up 
  3. The Gottman’s Positive Perspective
    1. We can either look at the actions of our loved one through rose colored glasses, clear glasses, or poop colored glasses.  Which one(s) do you think is going to have the best outcome?
    2. Five positive interactions to one negative interactions (e.g. affection, appreciation, listening, rituals).
    3. Small actions lead to big results

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