Tag Archives: validation

COL586: What is. . . Authenticity?

In this episode of Cubs Out Loud, the cubs present another chapter of our “What Is…” series. The guys are joined by COL Resident Sex Therapist Edward Angelini-Cooke to unravel authenticity. As many folks had time on their hands in 2020 to be introspective, the idea of being authentic to themselves and what that means rang true. But, what does this mean and what steps can one take to find authenticity?

Show Topic

Our ‘What is…’ series – focusing on Authenticity. We survived 2020 which tried us in so many ways. Some took the opportunity to look inward and reflect on self-improvement. 

Background – Jenna Marbles and the End of Authenticity 

  • Authenticity is a process, that involves progress and context
  • “The Good Place” – We can’t just forget our progress
  • Phones don’t allow us to do that….every video can be interpreted as a present moment in time
  • YouTube creators deleting content reduces authenticity similar to ripping up pages in a diary so you are only seeing “the good stuff”
  • Similar to “Burn” in Hamilton 

Brené Brown is a social worker and researcher with the University of Houston’s Graduate School of Social Work.  She has spent the past two decades studying courage, shame, empathy, and vulnerability.  

Basically, in order for us to practice authenticity, we need courage, compassion, and connection.

  • Fear keeps us distant from courage where vulnerability gets us closer 
  • Sympathy keeps us distant from compassion where empathy gets us closer 
  • Shame keeps us distant from connection where vulnerability, empathy, power, and freedom get us closer.

“The Compass” analogy 

  • Values = North, West, South, East
  • Action = Points on the map 

Ten Questions to explore authenticity 

  1. What is my greatest strength?  What is my greatest weakness?
  2. What is my proudest achievement? What is my biggest failure?
  3. What am I worried about? (Think about a room where all your worries live…what is in there?)
  4. What do I believe in? What are my values?
  5. What am I interested in that I haven’t tried?
  6. How are my relationships?
  7. What do I like and dislike about my job?
  8. What does my inner critic tell me?
  9. Is your inner monologue more critical than not?
  10. I know when I am stressed when I  ____.

Think of a recent experience with a partner, friend, family member, or co-worker where you wanted to be authentic but weren’t. Imagine pausing at the height of this interaction and asking yourself the following questions:

  1. What am I afraid would happen if I shared my experience right now with this person?
  2. How will I feel if I don’t share what I’m thinking and feeling?
  3. If I weren’t afraid, what would I most want to say to this person right now?
  4. How can I share this with even more vulnerability?

Resources

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COLDR: AS3E02: VH1 Divas

In this episode of COL Drag Race ‘T-Time’, Gary and Chester are joined by a extra special guest hosts Greg and Derek from Men of the Den! Tune in to find out who they thought belted it out of the park and who deserved rotten eggs for their performance in VH1 Divas, a tribute to RuPaul.

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Feedback:

YouTube Comment:

  • Re: COLDR: AD3E01 – Mike A: Chester was coming through crystal clear on this video, like HD- never realized he had such beautiful blue eyes ;). Great show, cant wait for the rest of your recaps.

Weekly Topic

RuPaul’s Drag Race All Stars 3 Episode 2

Thoughts on This Episode:

  • [Greg] – Evenly Matched Thus Far
  • [Gary] – Bitching Isn’t Winning
  • [Chester] – Huge Egos

Snaps / Eyerolls:

  • [Greg] – Snaps for . . . Shangela’s Mariah Carey & Runway
  • [Greg] – Eyerolls for . . . Milk’s Celine Dion/Peanut Butter
  • [Chester] – Snaps for… Aja’s Disastah Redux
  • [Chester] – Eyerolls for… Production Team
  • [Gary] – Snaps for… BenDeLaCreme’s Julie Andrews
  • [Gary] – Eyerolls for… Kennedy’s F’n Crystals

Cooldown Topics

Closing Thoughts:

  • [Greg] – Milk should have been in bottom two, BenDeLaCreme needs to watch her back
  • [Derek] – Milk is the Roxxy Andrews and go to Top Four
  • [Gary] – Some issues still exist
  • [Chester] – Season 2 all over again

Fantasy League
Drag Race Bingo

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COLDR: S9E10: Makeovers: Crew Better Work

In this episode of COL Drag Race ‘T-Time’, the guys are again joined by Brady to discuss the magical makeover challenge of the most recent episode of RuPaul’s Drag Race. This time, the show’s crew are the victims of this dragnificent makeup challenge. Which queen lip-sticks the competition? Check out the cubs’ looks as they put down the foundation for a blushing makeover.

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Feedback:

Facebook Comment:

  • AJ Lewis: “I have a request, although the season is almost over, could you all please stop talking around the episode and out of order? I ask because you guys do not mention names, the scene or anything as though a spoiler will be released a week after the show aired. Yes we all know Valentina didn’t know the song and was sent home as a result, so please critique that action. Pick apart Debbie downer Nina or better yet their outfits.”

Weekly Topic

RuPaul’s Drag Race Season 9 Episode 10

Thoughts on This Episode:

  • [Gary] – It took 10 to be entertained
  • [Damon] – The cast and crew are family
  • [Chester] – SO. MUCH. FUN.
  • [Brady] – Mothertuckers!

Thoughts on Untucked:

  • [Damon] – Peppermint and Trinity have had it.
  • [Chester] – Fun carried over…
  • [Brady] – Not surprised…but hamburgers!?
  • [Gary] – Where’s Nina? Oh, nevermind

Cooldown Topics

Takeaways:

  • [Chester] – True sisterhood
  • [Brady] – Let’s talk about Brady ;D
  • [Gary] – Mental Health for All to See
  • [Damon] – Walking a Mile…

Snaps / Eyerolls:

  • [Gary] – Snaps for… Wintergreen Tastes Great & Donatella Velour’s Shade at Trinity
  • [Gary] – Eyerolls for… Unavoidable Behaviors
  • [Damon] – Snaps for… Kesha and Wintergreen banter..EPIC!
  • [Damon] – Eyerolls for… Nina giving up, but not giving up.  
  • [Chester] – Snaps for… Wintergreen for All Stars 3!
  • [Chester] – Eyerolls for… Nina just laying on the couch
  • [Brady] – Snaps for… Nina attempting to sew.
  • [Brady] – Eyerolls for… Consistency!

Closing Thoughts:

  • [Damon] – Top 5 Bitches!! Not who I thought it was…
  • [Chester] – Pure entertainment, fun all around
  • [Brady] – Great episode, and the top 4 is…
  • [Gary] – We Are Family & Queens will be slayed by the cuts from 1,000 nit picks

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COL330: Everyday We’re Tumblin’

COL330In this episode of Cubs Out Loud, the cubs discuss one of their favorite things: Tumblr (No, it’s not another TTO). From porn to blogs and all that’s in between, the guys revisit their conversation on what Tumblr means to them and what they are getting out of it.

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Introduction Topics

What’s Going On?

  • Jeff:  4/13 Mythic, #DKlife
  • Damon: Home is Secured
  • Gary: PS – ugh

Feedback:

Facebook Likes:

  • Josh Wilson
  • Blake Anderson
  • CJ Whitmer

Urbandictionary with Gary

Tumblr Orgasm

The feeling a Tumblr-user feels when they get a lot of likes, reblogs and audio plays when they post something, especially when they cannot get it themselves. It usually happens when someone who has a lot of followers reblogs one thing and is the cause of the orgasm.

Marielle Perez reblogged my song and I’m totally having a Tumblr Orgasm!

Weekly Topic

Discussion of Tumblr as an online site, resource, and social platform

  • How has it changed our lives?
  • What do we get from it?

Cooldown Topics

I’ll Tumbl For You:

Links:

  • Jeff: Invincible by Two Steps From Hell

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