Tag Archives: contract

COL709: WGO: August 2023

In this episode of Cubs Out Loud, it’s our What’s Going On for the month of August. With the end of summer on the horizon, the guys tell all about their August month. From birthday and pride celebrations to a title win, the cubs had quite the month!

What’s Going On?

  • Jeff: I was 42 going on 43
  • Damon: Cinci Leather
  • Gary: Pride season slowdown

Feedback 

Twitter Followers:

  • @eSigmaWolf

Facebook Follows:                               

  • Erick Lundgren

Facebook Follows & Likes:

  • Yuan Garut
  • Jordan Blaisdell
  • Mario Fernandez
  • Mridul Kundra
  • Max Thieriot
  • Pierto Mastro
  • Jefry Awang
  • Mike Martin
  • Boyd Braden
  • Naveen Rajput
  • Pupbearcub Hollenback
  • Jake Ziegelmeyer
  • Robert Bates

Facebook Comment/Post:

  • Comment on post “All we have to say is… LOVE THIS FOR YOU DAMON! We’re so proud of your achievement and look forward to this coming year’s reign.”  Brian Richards: Congratulations. Eric Feutz: Congrats to you both!

Patreon Updates

  • Shoutout to Michael K who joined us 9/1/22 last year, happy one year anniversary!
  • BIG BEAR CUB HUGS to our Patrons: 
    • Cubsters: Charles W., Daniel C., and Michael K.
    • Ubehrs: Dave T., Li, Michael Q, and Tim S.
    • plus our Buddies: Lloyd G. and Michael V!

Recent Shows

  • COL705: WGO: July ‘23
  • COL706: Nerd Culture: Then vs Now
  • COL707: LTAS: Fave Porn Tropes
  • COL708: Jeff’s BDay Happy Hour: 7-11 Edition

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COL623: What’s Going On – October 2021

In this episode of Cubs Out Loud, it’s our What’s Going On for the month of October. It’s the end of Halloween month and the cubs bring us up to date on their lives as harvest closes. From working times to vacation vibes, it’s been quite the busy month for the guys.

What’s Going On?

  • Jeff: Nesting and Achievements
  • Damon: Enjoying the Swing and Time Off
  • Gary: Ramped Up and Getting Busier

Feedback 

Facebook Likes:

  • Andrew Edwards
  • Blu McDavid
  • Thomas McDonagh
  • Khan Khans

Facebook Comment/Post:

  • Edward AC re: COL621: LoR: Creating Your Party: – Here is the image we were discussing!

YouTube Subscribers:

  • Enrique Balzaretti

YouTube Comment:

  • Oan R. re: COL620: LTAF: It’s Autumn Time – Damon: – What do you prefer in your apple.  Me: I prefer Gary. He’s the apple of my eye. Also Gary should get some cranberries and pecans, a nice pie crust and some flour and cinnamon for topping. Maybe throw some crystallized ginger in there too.
  • dindin mooshi re: COL621: LoR: Creating Your Party – Good topic, interesting discussion, relationship dynamics and interactions of LGBTQIA ppl are so peculiar, we are so different compared to the heteros. PS: Thank you ED. 

Twitter Comment:

  • @Awq_Oan Oct 3: Thoughts on today’s episode of @cubsoutloud from the : Man, I must say, Gary was looking nice today. Also, they all had some interesting points about the things. Yes. Well done.
  • @Awq_Oan – Oct 15: Anybody remember when on @cubsoutloud Jeff started talking about apples and Damon was saying how much he hated applesauce and then Gary was talking about how he has to many apples and I was just thinking about rubbing against his beard? Good times.
  • @Awq_Oan – Oct 15: G A R L I C S A L T E D B O O T Y H O L E @cubsoutloud

Recent Shows

  • COL619: WGO: September 2021 
  • COL620: LTAF: It’s Autumn Time
  • COL621: Landscape of Relationships: Creating Your Party
  • COL622: LTAS: Horror Stories

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COLFB321: Goldilocks and the Three Bears

Welcome to another Flashback episode this week! We’re off this week. However, I present to you a COL Flashback to episode 321 on July 12th, 2015 – five years ago. In this episode you will hear us interview the truly amazing, one and only special guest Ms. Tammy! Let’s take a listen to our discussion with her about women and their involvement in the Bear community in this special Flashback show to COL Episode 321!

321In this episode of Cubs Out Loud, the guys are joined by the lovely Ms Tammy to chat about “Goldilocks”, women who are friendly with the bear community. As we discuss the idea of allowing biological women into bear clubs and bars (& even Growlr), we learn more about why Ms Tammy got involved in the community.

Introduction Topics

What’s Going On?

  • Jeff – Contract ended
  • Damon – First Holiday at the House…sort of
  • Gary – Gay camping recovery mode

Urbandictionary With Gary

sausage fears – a term to describe the actions of straight men who are afraid of showing any physical or emotional bond to the men they are friends with. This is akin to saying “no homo,” and is a result of toxic masculinity and homophobia

“Why is Derek afraid of hugging Jonathan?” “He’s got mad sausage fears, bro.”

Weekly Topic

Goldilocks [women in the bear community]

  • History
  • Involvement
  • Representation
  • Experience
  • Future outcomes

Cooldown Topics

I’ll Tumbl For You:

I’ll Tumbl For You:

 

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COL540: The Landscape of Relationships – Part 2

In this episode of Cubs Out Loud, the guys are joined once again by Edward Angelini-Cooke for an in depth discussion on relationships. For this second part, the guys delve into boundaries and rules. With Edward’s help, the cubs discuss the similarities and differences between these two terms, how they relate to each person and those involved in the relationship, and also discord on the potential minefield of expectations. How do we set our boundaries? Are expectations a good or a bad thing? What’s on your relationship checklist? The guys hash out these questions and more.

Show Topic

The Landscape of Relationships – Boundaries and Rules

Boundaries (“I Will/I Won’t”) v. Rules/Agreements/Expectations (“You/We Won’t”)

  • debated topic within relationship communities 
  • Is this a rule or a boundary?
    • Boundary as skin metaphor (protects us from bacteria, allows the good stuff in and sweats the bad stuff out, elastic with limitations [you can break skin], boundaries are about me
    • Rules are about us and you, jealousy, usually some form of control 
  • Pros and Cons of Rules 
    • Pros:
      • Contracts 
      • Establishing or Re-establishing solid foundation of connection and intimacy
      • Conditional…not unilateral or controlling
      • Spoken
    • Cons:
      • Can be Controlling
      • Can be rigid and unhealthy
      • Can be Set up to be broken 
      • Unspoken
  • Agreements are similar to the idea of a relationship contract or vows 
  • Expectations are resentments waiting to happen

Kinds of Personal Boundaries 

  • Emotional 
    • Example: Don’t go to the hardware store for bread
  • Physical
    • Examples: allergies, personal bubble, DON’T COME INTO MY ROOM, MOM!!!!
  • Time
    • Examples: don’t make plans within 24 hours, I have office hours on Tuesdays
  • Sexual
    • Examples: Consent, Refer to checklist
  • Intellectual 
    • Examples: Agree to disagree, awareness of who and what you are talking about 
  • Material 
    • Examples: Don’t lend out money, I need that sling back by Friday etc

Open-Relationship Checklist 

  • Fill this out separately for you, not your partner 
    • Find out your boundaries first THEN discuss your partner’s THEN discuss how they overlap or don’t overlap

Review:

  • Communication 
  • Boundaries are like skin 
  • You Don’t Have to Be In an Open Relationship to Discuss Boundaries!!!!!

Books:

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COL502: HNU: GROWLr Acquisition

In this episode of Cubs Out Loud, news is on the March!! It’s another Hostful News Update and this time around the cubs talk about the recent purchase of the bear social app Growlr. How will the app’s acquisition by the straight owned Meet Group affect the app? The guys give their feelings and opinions on the matter. IS THIS THE END OF GROWLR?!?! *gay gasp* Turn your drama dials down and find out.

Show Topic

Recently the Bear world found out that community based app GROWLr was acquired by The Meet Group [aka purchased/sold].

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