In this episode of Cubs Out Loud, the guys continue their “What is…” series with an episode on pleasure. So, what’s your pleasure? What’s my pleasure? Is it a pleasure to meet you or a pleasure to make your acquaintance? Is pleasure just sexual or are there multiple types of pleasure? Listen in as the cubs get to the pleasure principle and break it all down for you. Will this episode be pleasurable to you?
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What is… Pleasure?
Definition: noun – a feeling of happy satisfaction and enjoyment. Adjective – used or intended for entertainment rather than business. Verb – give sexual enjoyment or satisfaction to.
In this episode of Cubs Out Loud, it’s our What’s Going On for the month of April. For this month, the guys bring you up to date on their continuing “new normal” during the pandemic. From D&D to looking at D, the cubs give you some insight on themselves, the podcast and more.
In this episode of Cubs Out Loud, the guys are joined again by Edward Angelini-Cooke of EAC Therapy and COL’s resident sex therapist. For this episode, the cubs acknowledge their thirst due to many states’ social distancing regulations during the COVID-19 pandemic. Because of this, we bring in the good doc to discuss the sexual needs during this crisis. We all have needs and need to find ways to address them safely.
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COVID-19 isn’t going away. And now more than ever we’re facing challenges with having our sexual needs met. What’s a person to do?
This is an extended traumatic experience….which means that people are going to have traumatic reactions to this. Here are some common traumatic reactions and ways to address them sexually:
IMPORTANT: Our reactions to this may be different therefore we may have different sexual libidos during this time (that is normal).
In this episode of Cubs Out Loud, the guys are joined once again by Edward Angelini-Cooke for an in depth discussion on relationships. For this second part, the guys delve into boundaries and rules. With Edward’s help, the cubs discuss the similarities and differences between these two terms, how they relate to each person and those involved in the relationship, and also discord on the potential minefield of expectations. How do we set our boundaries? Are expectations a good or a bad thing? What’s on your relationship checklist? The guys hash out these questions and more.
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The Landscape of Relationships – Boundaries and Rules
Boundaries (“I Will/I Won’t”) v. Rules/Agreements/Expectations (“You/We Won’t”)
debated topic within relationship communities
Is this a rule or a boundary?
Boundary as skin metaphor (protects us from bacteria, allows the good stuff in and sweats the bad stuff out, elastic with limitations [you can break skin], boundaries are about me
Rules are about us and you, jealousy, usually some form of control
Pros and Cons of Rules
Pros:
Contracts
Establishing or Re-establishing solid foundation of connection and intimacy
Conditional…not unilateral or controlling
Spoken
Cons:
Can be Controlling
Can be rigid and unhealthy
Can be Set up to be broken
Unspoken
Agreements are similar to the idea of a relationship contract or vows
Expectations are resentments waiting to happen
Kinds of Personal Boundaries
Emotional
Example: Don’t go to the hardware store for bread
Physical
Examples: allergies, personal bubble, DON’T COME INTO MY ROOM, MOM!!!!
Time
Examples: don’t make plans within 24 hours, I have office hours on Tuesdays
Sexual
Examples: Consent, Refer to checklist
Intellectual
Examples: Agree to disagree, awareness of who and what you are talking about
Material
Examples: Don’t lend out money, I need that sling back by Friday etc
In this episode of Cubs Out Loud, it’s another Let’s Talk About Sex. In this multi-part series, the cubs are joined again by Daddy Hadrian to talk about what porn has taught us. For this third part, the guys discuss the future of porn. How much porn will there be in the future and what will it entail? What will dictate the future of porn: our human nature or the growth and changing of technology? Listen in as the cubs peer into their crystal balls and gaze deeper into the vastness of the black hole that is porn.
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Let’s Talk About Sex Series: What Porn Taught Us – Part Three
What will porn be like in the future and how will it affect the next generations?