Griff and Jeff address some listener feedback surrounding gay youth while Tim is off celebrating his boyfriend’s birthday.

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Amazing Weekends

Feedback:

• Email from Justin

Hey Guys,
I am 24 years old and I live in California. From my experience around my area, There is still segregation in different communities (Bear and Twink for the most part). I weigh in at 220 with a little athletic build, and with my smaller-older brother being gay (He weighs at 110lbs) we seem to fit in different communities. He has a lot of older friends (40’s and 50’s) and they still look at me like I am not welcomed in their group. I can see if I don’t feel welcomed at my age and weight, would someone in high school with the same weight or build feel the same way? For the most part, California seems to be getting better with opening up to Gay’s (in my opinion) with support of Celebrities (Such as Ellen) and out reach programs and events.I think that is a great boost for the morale…

AAANNNDDD….. Bike Shorts….. I say they do serve two purposes (for a nice cute cub for me anyway). One, They reduce friction between the thighs. Two, Good for starting foreplay.

You guys are Awesome, Keep up the good work.

Justin

• Comment from Todd

In jr. high I was often made fun of for being or acting “gay.” I think this type of animosity towards gay people was definitely taught by parents and peers; I’m sure issue of gay rights made it a more common topic. However, in jr. high nothing is off limits. Kids were made fun of and picked on for everything including race, economic background, and mental or physical disabilities. It might still be okay to be openly homophobic these days, but kids certainly degrade their peers in ways that are deemed hateful and wrong by larger society. It’s not just a gay issue, but bullying feels worse when it seems that the rest of society is against you as well. I think achieving equal rights would actually do a lot to improve the self-esteem of gay teenagers along with the slow shift in our culture’s attitudes towards gay people. Parents and teachers are in the best position to try to actively put and end to bullying though. I’m not sure what gay population could do specifically.

I actually came out in high school while Queer Eye for the Straight Guy was at its peak in popularity. I think prominent depictions of gay men in the media do help gay teens feel more comfortable with themselves, but I was very worried that others would judge me by the stereotypes they saw in such shows. It was nice to see homosexuality acknowledged in a somewhat positive way, but it is certainly a double-edged sword.

As for DADT, I think it should be repealed, but it is never going to be my cause of choice. For one it is a good excuse if that draft comes back, but I do not live in a state that offers protection from discrimination based on sexual orientation (outside of state work), so I guess I don’t feel all that bad… ? I think protesting Red Cross blood drives is probably the biggest waste of time though.

You said 24-year-olds should respond, so I did! Hopefully it wasn’t too disjointed.

• Email from Jack at The Cubby House

Hey Guys,

I wanted to respond to your question from last week about supporting gay youth. I wanted to share from my experience.

I realise that my experience of growing up gay in urban Australia was quite positive.

I came out in high-school and the response was rather neutral from my classmates.I did encounter a few inappropriate questions from the younger grades and minor harassment from one particular underclasswoman. When I wrote a submission for the school newsletter about resources for GLBTI students I was rejected by the principal who argued along the lines “It’s not what parents expect from the newsletter”

But for me, the things that were the most helpful for me were the books that were available from the local library. Firstly there were really good books explaining the body and sexuality in a frank, informative and un-condescending manner. In particular “What’s happening to my body: book for boys”. Also having fictional books which have young gay characters and GBLTI themes. Books like “Boy Meets Boy” and “Rainbow Boys” were helpful.

As a teenager, I would look on the websites and the gay press and I knew what I was missing out as I was under the age to go to venues. I think providing opportunities for young people to meet in a non-bar setting is a challenge. I thought I was fairly fortunate. Where I live there is a
network of GBLTIQ youth groups run out of community health centres and an organisation called Minus-18 would run dance parties for underage youth. There were also big gay carnivals and the Melbourne Queer film festival offered special screenings of short films for young people.

Also, JOY 94.9 the gay and lesbian radio station, got a 4 year grant from the Foundation of Young Australians to provide certificate III courses in Radio Broadcasting for free. This is how Cookie and I got certified in radio, it was a good networking opportunity and we could feel a part of the community outside of the bar scene.

But I think the age of drinking is a big problem in the United States. In Australia I started participating within the Bear scene when I was legally allowed to at 18 and I’ve been a member, contributor and organiser to the subculture since then. I feel that it is an important part of myself. I’ve been recently been making preparations to travel to the United States and Canada to participate in and compete at International Bear Rendezvous. According to the forms, I need to be 21 when the forms are due in December, but I turn 21 four days before the event start in February.

Because of this, I may not be able to compete or even get a pass and frankly it makes me feel really invalidated. I feel that this would be a common sentiment among young people trying to enter into the Bear subculture and wider-GLBTI scene. They know more than ever what they are
missing out on, but still having to deal with these same-old gatekeeper issues.

For that reason, I applaud social-networking website bearcubhouse for accepting underage people so they can network and participate in the community. It’s a step in the right direction.

As you can see, I have been quite fortunate growing up, not everyone has it so easily. The questions you’re asking of the United States are the same questions we are asking of our own GBLTI youth in country and regional Australia.

Jack Chapman
thecubbyhouse.net.au

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• Gay’s abandoning Obama…who the fuck else you going to vote for?

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